four

From time to time, the wind knocks on the roof of the window, and you can hear the whistling wind. God 1 is singing it gloomily in the fireplace. It’s past midnight, and everyone in the family is in bed, but no one is asleep. Najia always feels that the building seems like someone is playing the piano. Suddenly, a window guard falls down. Soon Nina Ivanovna comes in. She is wearing a shirt and holding a candle.
Something rang Najia, she asked
Mother combed her hair in a braid and smiled timidly. On this stormy night, she looked old, ugly and short. Najia couldn’t help remembering that not long ago she had always recognized her mother as extraordinary and always listened to her with pride. But now she can’t remember these words, and everything that can be remembered is plain and meaningless.
In the fireplace, it whined like a few bass voices singing in chorus. I can hear it. Oh, my God, I sigh. Najia sat in bed and suddenly pulled her hair and cried.
Mom, mom, she said, my dear mom, if only you could know what happened to me. I beg you, please let me go. I beg you.
Where to go Nina Ivanovna asked her what was going on and sat down on the bed. Where are you going?
Najia cried for a long time and couldn’t say a word
Please let me leave this city. She finally said that there should be no wedding and there will be no wedding. You have to understand that I don’t love this person and I don’t even think of him.
No, my dear, no, Nina Ivanovna was frightened and eagerly said, calm down. You are in a bad mood, which will lead to the past. It’s common. Maybe you quarreled with Andre, but the young couple didn’t quarrel for the sake of heart.
All right, you go, mom. You go. Naja burst into tears again.
It was Nina Ivanovna who was silent for a moment and said that not long ago, you were a little girl, and now you are going to be a bride. Everything is always updated, and before you know it, you will be a mother and grandmother, and you will be a stubborn and sexual daughter like me.
My dear good mother, you are clever, but you are also unfortunate. Najia said that you are unfortunate. Why do you say vulgar things? Look at what Di Fener told me.
Nina Ivanovna wanted to say something, but she couldn’t say a word. She sobbed and ran back to her room. The bass began to sing in the fireplace. Suddenly, it became very terrible. Naja jumped out of bed and ran to her mother’s room. Nina Ivanovna was lying in bed with tears all over her body, covered with a light blue quilt and holding one in her hand.
Mom, listen to me. Najia said, I beg you to live well. Think about it. You will be white. I want you to be white. How vulgar and small our life is. My eyes are open. Now I can see everything clearly. Who is Andre Andrejic? He is actually not clever with his mother. Oh, my God, you want to be white. He is stupid.
Nina Ivanovna suddenly sat up.
You and your grandmother came to torture me. She choked and said that I want to live. She repeatedly punched my chest twice. You gave me back. I was young. I wanted to live, but you turned me into an old woman.
She cried sadly, got into the room, huddled up and looked so weak, poor and stupid. Najia went back to her room and dressed, sat in the window and waited for dawn. That night, she had been sitting there thinking about someone knocking on the shutters and whistling from time to time in the courtyard.
Grandma complained that the wind blew the apple off that night, and an old plum tree was broken. It was gray and gloomy, and I wish I could light a lamp. Everyone complained that it was cold and rainy. After drinking tea, Najia went to Sasha and knelt down beside the round-backed chair in the corner and covered her face with her hands.
What’s the matter? Sasha asked
I can’t. How can I live here before she says I’m not white? I don’t understand. I despise my fiance and I despise this idle and meaningless life.
Come on, come on, Sasha answered again and again, and she didn’t understand. What’s the matter? It’s good
I’m tired of this life, Najia continued. I can’t stay here for a day. I’ll leave here one day. Please take me away, for the sake of Di Fener.
Sasha looked at her in surprise for a minute, and he finally came here for nothing, dancing like a child and dancing for joy.
That’s great. He rubbed his hands and said, My God, this is great.
She looked at him with big eyes full of love as if possessed, waiting for him to say something meaningful and important to her immediately. He didn’t say anything, but she already felt that she had opened a new and vast world before her. At this moment, she was looking forward to the arrival of a new world with full hope, and she was ready to die.
I left the next day, and he thought about it for a while, saying, you go to the car to see me off, put your luggage in my suitcase, I’ll buy your ticket, and when the bell rings for the third time, you’ll drive and we’ll go together. I’ll send you to Moscow, where you will go to Petersburg alone. Do you have your ID card?
I swear to you, you won’t regret it in the future. Sasha said excitedly, go, go, listen to your fate when you get there. Everything will change. The key is to change your life completely. The rest is not important. It is agreed that we will go together one day.
Ah, for the sake of Di Fener.
Najia felt that she was extremely excited at the moment, and her mood had never been so heavy. From now until before she left, she would be sad and think hard, but as soon as she got back to the building and went to bed, she fell asleep immediately. She slept soundly and smiled with tears until the evening.
five
Someone went to call for a cab. Naja had put on her hat and coat. She went downstairs to take a look at her mother and her things. She was still warm in her room, and she looked around for a moment. Then she gently walked to her mother’s room. Nina Ivanovna was still in the bedroom. Naja kissed her mother quietly. She had her hair cut for two or three minutes and then she went back to the floor unhurriedly.
It’s raining heavily outside, and the carriage has a wet hood and stopped at the gate.
Najia can’t take two people in the car. Grandma saw the servant put the suitcase in the car and said that you must give it away in this weather. You’d better stay at home and see how heavy the rain is.
Najia wanted to say something, but she couldn’t say a word. At this moment, Sasha helped her to sit in the car and put a checkered blanket over her leg. He also sat beside her.
Have a safe trip. Pray for God to bless you. Your grandmother shouted at the steps, Sasha, write to us when you get to Moscow.
Okay, goodbye, grandma
Pray for the Holy Mother to bless you.
Alas, Sasha said in this weather